I received a particularly disturbing email from someone I love yesterday. Someone I have a long association with. Someone who is dear to me. Someone with miles to go before he "sleeps." It was full of harsh, hateful, and judgmental comments about others. I'm glad I was in a hurry, because my natural tendency as has been sometimes recently, was to reply in kind and point out how vile his thinking was. I did not have time to respond in the moment. Such a lesson for me! There are times I have used wisdom and paused, but more often than not, the fiery words within me get composed and sent. Last night as I was preparing for bed, I decided to read a bit in Today I Begin a New Life.
While reading about the Art of Connection and Intrinsic Validation, I read these words from Og Mandino.
And how will I confront each whom I meet? In only one way. In silence and to myself I will address him and say I Love You. Though spoken in silence these words will shine in my eyes, unwrinkle my brow, bring a smile to my lips and echo in my voice; and his heart will be opened. And who is there who will say nay to my goods when his heart feels my love?
And my stony heart warmed. I do love this person, important to me. I do not love their actions and their words. But I can respond with love! Dave's summary is this:
When we lift, we attract instead of repel. As walls come down, floods of cooperation and productivity fill 0ur cups. When we focus on serving others with Agape love–charity, the English translation for the Greek word Agape–we are not sacrificed on the altar of life, as we have often feared, but instead we drink from living waters and thirst no more. We give up nothing and gain everything. (emphasis mine)
I KNEW intrinsically that responding in kind would only bring more of the same. But with love, there is an invitation for change, an invitation to see, an invitation to learn. I've known since I was 7 years old that I wanted to teach. It took most of my life to figure out in what capacity. 40 years later, I am finally getting it.
This morning as I came home from taking my children to school, I listened to Og's second scroll. I will begin each day with love in my heart. As I listened to those beautiful words, my heart was warmed even more, and there were more tears. Some days when I am not feeling particularly humble, I think I've reached a pretty great place in my life personally. Today I realized fully how much room there is for improvement!
These words touched me deeply.
yet my love will melt all hearts liken to the sun whose rays soften the coldest clay.…I will love all manners of men for each has qualities to be admired even though they be hidden. With love I will tear down the wall of suspicion and hate which they have built round their hearts and in its place will I build bridges so that my love may enter their souls.
Yes, there is certainly room for improvement. I invite you to join me. Love yourself, love "all manners of men", change the world by greeting each day with love in your heart. I will. Will you? I found one little gem of positivity in the words I received. I ignored every single negative and responded with love to that one gem. We'll see how it goes.
For the full scroll, listen here.
This is my son Joseph. He took a big interest in music starting as a teen. And it manisfested in dance. He loved getting a groove on and in high school won a talent competition of sorts three years in a row during Homecoming. He took piano growing up and continued self teaching in his teens. In high school he also joined the choir and had lots of solos. When he went to college he started taking plenty of music classes including voice lessons and piano. Last year he tried out for GV Idol here in SE Az and he did not make it. This year he was a finalist. Next year? Who knows? 🙂 For the part EFT played see below.
You knew this had to have an EFT connection right? I taught an EFT seminar a couple of months ago, and this son agreed to be my cameraman, so he got the benefits of the seminar too. 🙂 It came out during the class, that he had some fear around tryouts, auditions, etc. We worked on that quite extensively during the class and he was able to release his fears of auditioning. He specifically felt quite anxious about the thought of his name being called and it being his turn. After tapping, he could imagine it in the moment with no anxiety.
The unfortunate thing is, this boy had surgery on his knee a couple of months ago for a torn ACL and torn meniscus, so he could not choose a song he could groove to. And the boy can groove! No dancing for 6 months. 🙂 Just for interest, I texted him today and asked if he had any fear of getting on the stage when his name was called. And he said nope, he was just anxious to sing. And I smiled.
I'm convinced as we get older, we forget to practice being happy. Most of us work our 40 hour or more weeks, run kids here, there, and everywhere, and fall exhausted in to bed at night. But aren't we supposed to also be happy? Being happy is surely a great way to beat stress and feel good.
Last week, I went with my daughter to "Sea Camp" in San Diego. She and other 7th and 8th graders on her school's Knowledge Bowl team, worked hard all year fund raising, to spend 2 days in San Diego learning all about the ocean and Marine Life. I was able to go as a chaperone. Here is something from our trip together that made us very happy.
Other things that make me happy.
Sunsets, babies laughing, sleeping in, homemade bread, celebrating my kid's successes, beaches, mountains, holding hands with my sweetie, hugs, helping others, feeling close to my Creator, and lots more. What makes you happy? Take a moment this week, and do something that really makes you happy.
artist Simon Dewey
I haven't had the worst life in the world. In fact, all things considered, it's been pretty good. It started a little bumpy. I almost wasn't born. My parents split up before I was a twinkle in their eye and then they tried to reunite and well, they got me. There is a dispute over whether or not I was "wanted." And that's all I'll say about that. When I was about 4, my parents and my older brother were baptized. I remember sitting on someone's lap and watching. I remember my daddy carrying me into church in a dress.
When I was 5, there were big ugly fights, custody battles, bad adult behavior. And it ended with my brother and me being "illegally transported" out of the state. Although, at the time, it was not a Federal crime. My mother worked hard to make sure that it was in the future. As in now. So, I grew up without a mom. There was abuse before the split up and some after. Even though the adults thought I did not miss my mom, the fact is, I did. Maybe I missed being a family. Good or bad, it was my family.
My dad was a good dad. I knew he loved me. He did his best. My brother, as tumultuous as it was to have an older brother; also loved me. He gave himself permission to beat up on me, but watch out if anyone else did! My Granny and my dear auntie Mo were there as back up moms. They taught me the feminine skills that I had when I left home. I am grateful for their influence.
But, I came away from my childhood with a very keen poor self worth. I thought I was ugly and dumb and worthless. But, I had a happy personality and I got along. Those untruthful labels got a real beating, when at 19, my briefly renewed relationship with my mother ended tragically, at her own hand. I plunged into a quiet depression I am pretty sure most people weren't aware of. Maybe it wasn't depression. But I felt responsible for my mother's death and I was very sad for almost a full year.
Fast forward through marriage, motherhood, lessons, successes, failures to a few years ago. I had found and learned and been applying a new tool. EFT. I have no idea what I was working on, but I was using a book of affirmations to replace the negative with positive. I did not expect the one I came upon which not only stopped me in my tracks, but caused me to weep. "I am God's gift to the world." I immediately knew it was true, and my heart expanded at the knowledge. I pondered on it for quite some time before it really became a part of me. I thought about my Savior Jesus Christ.
"For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in Him should not perish, but have everlasting life."
God gave His Son as a gift to the world. He created an amazing plan for all of us to return to Him and he put all of His effort into one solution. To save the world. I thought about that. I thought about the children I had been putting so much effort into to rear and train and eventually send out into the world. I thought how my efforts were a gift to the world, and how I desperately wanted each of my dear offspring to succeed; to become what they were meant to be; and to change the world in the ways they are meant to. It made perfect sense. God gave His only begotten Son for a purpose. And each of His other billions of children who came into the world are also a gift with a purpose; to bless the lives of others.
It's kind of crazy, but it took me awhile to extrapolate my new found joy to others. I'm a little slow sometimes. So, on occasion, I had the opportunity to be at the right place and the right time, in someone's presence who needed the message I had found for myself. And I have shared with that person in that moment, that THEY are also God's gift to the world.
It did not occur to me until last week at the Master of Influence seminar, as we were assigned to share "our" message, that this *IS* my message. To share with any who need or any I come in contact with, that they are each uniquely God's gift to the world. Have you ever considered that? YOU, right there, sitting in your chair or at your desk, YOU have unique gifts and talents given only to you, to change the lives of others in ways, that NO ONE ELSE CAN!!!
Kirk Duncan told us at the seminar that inspiration minus expression equals depression. Wow! What an insight. How often do we have something to say and for whatever reason, we do not express it? How do YOU feel when that happens? Depressed is my guess.
So, don't do it anymore! What is your message? Please don't hide your light under a bushel. Some of God's children have some pretty big missions, and gifts to share. Others may have humble, quiet messages. Either way, you do have a purpose, a mission, a message. How are you God's gift to the world? Only you can answer that.
Fill in the blanks.
For God so loved the world, that He GAVE His (precious daughter/stalwart son) _______________ (insert your name), that whosoever (came in contact with) her/him, should have __________________ (fill in your purpose or mission).
For God so loved the world, that He gave His precious daughter Dawn, that whosoever became acquainted with her, should know that they are God's gift to the world.
OK. Now you know. And I promise to keep telling people, if you promise to do your part. 🙂 What do you think?
I introduced EFT to a friend. Hi Michelle. She has taken her enthusiasm and shared it with and blessed others. Including her sister who was expecting a baby. Hi Tara. I am sure I don't know all of the things it was used for. But, I know a few weeks ago Tara went into preterm labor and was put on bed rest. I know what that is like! (3 of my own pregnancies on bedrest) Michelle used EFT and helped her stop the contractions. That in and of itself may have saved thousands of dollars, plenty of stress, and potentially negative problems with the baby.
Michelle and I secretly fantasized about helping Tara when her time came. Last night I got a text. Tara's in labor, wanna come? So, we both hurriedly made arrangements for our own children and drove as safely as possible as two can possibly drive when you are trying to attend a birth and it's an hour away.
If you want to see strength and beauty in action, attend a birth of a woman who is prepared! Tara was a courageous mother who had done all she could to prepare and it showed. She used a hypnosis program (Hypno Babies) to prepare her mind and body for her baby boy's arrival. And you could tell. She walked happily and confidently around the hospital as things progressed. The nurses kept telling her she wasn't far enough along, she should be feeling pain, etc. I've done childbirth with hypnosis, and it does not have to be painful. *** In fact, Tara was trying to focus on comfort and mentioning pain wasn't helpful. So, her mom finally explained to the nurses what she had done to prepare and it made more sense why she was so calm and together.
EFT was used for fear and for almost every single surge (contraction) in the final stages of labor. Did she make it through with no pain at all? No. But her efforts and the loving assistance she had all around her by her family who all joined in tapping points that would help her, resulted in the desired outcome. A happy healthy baby. I have to say that this darling baby boy, hardly made a peep (as opposed to the little fellow in the next room that hollered his head off) and seemed content from his first moments of introduction to life. Not saying there was anything wrong with the little one next door hollering. But it made me wonder if it was due to her wonderful calm preparation. My use of hypnosis for labor and deliver was similar. A very quiet, alert, content baby.
After baby came, we also used EFT to help with the pain and discomfort after birth. There are a myriad of ways that EFT can be used for expectant mothers and babies. We only used it for a few. Childbirth can be traumatic and EFT can gently erase past traumas and open up the possibilities for the future. I am so grateful I was allowed to enter such a sacred event, for it is my belief that babies come heaven sent. For my next EFT health tip on how to prevent a miscarriage, sign up for my free EFT demo and Happy Healthy News & Tips right over there on the right. And tell a friend!
***My last birth was with Hypno Babies. I slept all night in active labor. My hubby and doula did not have anything to do. 🙂 At 6 am I got out of bed to take a shower. Ten minutes later I was urgently back in bed and was delivered of a baby girl less than 20 minutes later with minimal pain.